“I don’t let my daughter text or go on SpaceBook.” — Brett Favre

Minnesota Viking fans like me have been a little preoccupied over the past couple of weeks after allegations surfaced that future Hall of Fame quarterback Brett Favre texted several female employees of the New York Jets, his former team, in an apparent effort to entice them into having an affair with him. Favre, a married grandfather, hasn’t really addressed the allegations publicly and instead keeps changing the topic to the efforts by him and his Vikings teammates to continue to improve upon a very slow start to a very promising season.

The scandal seems centered around an explicit text message that Favre allegedly sent to Jenn Sterger, who gained national attention when an ABC camera spotlighted her in the stands at a Florida State University football game back in 2005. She later appeared in Playboy and as a sideline TV personality on New York Jets telecasts. It was when she was doing TV work for the Jets that she apparently caught Favre’s eye and he decided that more than anything else, a young woman would love to receive a text message showing the penis of a grandfather who works for the same organization. If Favre actually engaged in such sexting, that’s pretty gross and could earn him a suspension from the National Football League. Yes, even the NFL would regard such actions as being beneath its standards.

Perhaps the only amusing thing to come out of this controversy is Favre’s statement about how he is bewildered by technology. He was quoted during an interview at his farm by a reporter as having said, “I don’t let my daughter text or go on SpaceBook.” Where do I start? Does he prohibit his 11 year old daughter from texting because older men might want to send to her lewd photographs? Hmmm. That’s a little like the pot calling the kettle black. I can just hear the conversation. “Honey, I don’t want you texting. Men will likely send you photos of their penises. I know that will likely happen, dearest, because I’ve done that and I’m a man.” Or should we focus on SpaceBook, whatever that may be. Could Favre have confused MySpace and Facebook and mashed them together? “I’m sorry, your honor. I don’t think that I should be held responsible for sending obscene photographs to that young woman. You see, I just don’t understand technology well enough to do more than take a photograph of my penis and send it as a picture message to her.”