So you've recently been let go from your company and are receiving unemployment benefits when an amazing thing happens - you get a job offer. But it's not the offer you were hoping for. While it will definitely pay the bills, it will result in you taking less than 50-percent of what you were making.

What do you do? Is it best to take the low-paying job or continue taking the unemployment benefits? This is definitely not a decision that comes with a textbook answer. However, you may benefit from some basic tips to help guide your decision.

Get a Good Grasp of Your Field

While holding out is not a bad idea for a while, it's not the best idea to do so blindly. Meaning, if you're applying for jobs and simply collecting unemployment benefits without knowing what's going on with your field, you may be setting yourself up for a financial and career disaster.

Think about it; there is a reason that your job let its employees go. Business probably was not good. This means, depending on your field, suffering business may be widespread. Therefore, it is important that you spend time studying what's going on in your field so that you don't waste unnecessary time pursuing dead-end opportunities. Check to see if the companies you're applying with are planning to layoff workers anytime soon. You could even take this paid time off to educate yourself in new fields. It may have been a blessing in disguise that propels you toward a passion you've always wanted to nurture.

You Were Given Unemployment Benefits for a Reason

One thing that you should keep in mind when deciding whether to take the lower-paying position is that you were given unemployment benefits for a reason. Not only are they meant to help keep you afloat as you look for new employment, but they were established to make sure that those who are recently unemployed don't feel that they have to accept anything that's offered to them.

While you are required to actively seek employment while receiving benefits, there is no rule that says you have to take anything you're offered. So if you feel that you can go a while longer on the benefits you're receiving then continuing your search for a position that is roughly comparable to the job you previously held in both salary and benefits isn't necessarily a bad thing.

Choose Wisely - And According to Your Family's Needs

As mentioned previously, choosing the right path in this type of situation is not easy. Depending on your family's financial needs in the short and long term, your decision can vary greatly. So take time to sit down with your family and weigh your options collectively, to ensure everyone is considered in this challenging decision.

The decision to accept a lower-paying position can be devastating when you consider the years of hard work you may have put into another job. It can be a major blow to the ego and wallet. So make sure that your decision to accept or deny is an informed one to ensure you and your family can benefit for years to come.

Heather Eagar is a former professional resume writer and is passionate about providing working professionals with current, reliable and effective job search tools and information. If you're in need of a resume service, compare the top ones in the industry at http://www.resumelines.com

Posted by Heather Eagar on February 27, 2009 at 2:35 PM | Leave a Comment (0)

I know I have posted on this topic before but given our current economic situation and the tragic stories I have heard over the past couple of days I think it bears repeating. When times are tough its more important than ever to take care of your mental and physical well being.

It seems like many people worry about everything except their mental and physical health when they are stressed out about losing a job, not having enough money, or possibly losing a home. On the face of it that makes sense because those are such crucial issues. But if you aren't physically and mentally strong enough to handle devastating events then the whole situation will spiral out of control and you will be even less equipped to make sound decisions. I have also found that people who are depressed do not interview as well as those who seem happy and well adjusted. If you don't take care of your mental health you could wind up being your own worst enemy in job interviews.

I have been through some very tough times in the past and I can't say that I took the advice that I am dispensing right now - but I certainly wish I would have.

Tips for dealing with potential unemployment.

1. Find a support network. Could be friends at church, other volunteers at the soup kitchen, AA, book club, or networking groups.

2. Get one-on-one counseling of some kind. Priest, minister, life coach, or, if you still have insurance, a therapist. If you don't have insurance you might find out if you can negotiate a lower fee or barter services with a therapist. Believe me, it is worth it to have an impartial sounding board to help you find healthy ways to cope when times are hard.

3. Rely on friends/family for emotional support but don't overburden them. If you confuse your friends with therapists you may exhaust your friends and stress your relationships when you need them most.

4. Exercise. Try to get at least a little exercise every day whether its a walk around the block, a yoga class, or a 5 mile run. It will keep your body and mind in peak condition.

5. Eat healthy foods. Try to resist the urge to drown your sorrows in a carton of ice cream, a bag of chips, or a bottle of vodka. Good nutrition and exercise will keep you in peak condition to deal with trying times. I just started reading a book called the Engine 2 Diet which touts the virtues of a plant-based diet. One big benefit is that it's inexpensive so if you are looking to cut costs eating more vegetables is a good way to go. Also, a plant based diet reduces cholesterol and significantly reduces the risk of many serious diseases which, if you are unemployed, is a big deal. It's something to think about. (There is also an Engine 2 Diet website with (I think) some free recipes if you are interested.)

6. Focus on the positive. Force yourself to find one thing to be happy about every day so that you don't start seeing the world as a dark and overwhelming place. Maybe a beautiful sunrise, your spouse, your kids, your dog, good health, or whatever. Be grateful for something - it will help you stay positive.

Following are some tactical ideas for preparing for potential or current unemployment and all the tangential issues that go along with it.

Are you worried about being laid off? Have you been laid off? Are you concerned about paying your mortgage or are you facing foreclosure? Create an action plan so that you are prepared if the worst happens. Following are a few items I recommend adding to the list:

Update your resume If you need assistance with your resume contact a resume writer. If you can't afford the fee, negotiate or offer to barter services. I can't speak for all resume writers but many of us understand these difficult times and want to help as much as we can.

Learn to use the internet to search for potential jobs and companies that are hiring. Linked In, Google, Ask, Indeed, and Facebook are all great online resources that you can use to source jobs and information about companies that may be hiring. Jason Alba is expert on this topic. Check out his blog.

Activate your network - Let people know you are looking for a new job.
Think about the job you will seek if you are laid off - be specific or you may not get the help from your network that you want. People are more supportive if you help them to understand exactly what you are looking for because they have less work to do to help you.

Save money - even if you are in debt up to your eyeballs you have to find a few dollars you can stash away. Cut back on non-essentials so you have cash on hand.

Contact your creditors in advance - talk to your banker, credit card companies, and student loan companies BEFORE you are in crisis. They want to get paid and may be willing to work with you rather than have you default on loans. Resource: Ilyce Glink, the real estate expert, has many inexpensive books and ebooks available in her online store that address everything from how to save extra money, how to deal with creditors, and how to prepare for foreclosure. If you have financial problems you NEED to know Ilyce. Click here to go to her online store.

Create a list of emergency resources in case you are laid off and you can't find a job before your cash runs out - food banks, Bishop's Pantry, shelters, churches, or find out if you can move in with family or friends in an emergency. It's better to plan for the worst and have things turn out OK than the other way around.

Find creative ways to earn extra cash. Babysitting, pet sitting, dog walking, washing cars, cleaning homes, mowing lawns, or selling stuff on ebay. There are so many things people do to earn extra cash. Start getting creative and thinking about what skills you have that someone else might pay for. You can advertise by posting flyers in public locations, advertising in your HOA newsletter, word of mouth, or on your blog (see next tip).

Start a blog. You can set up a blog for free at www.blogger.com and it can be a great way to release some tension, showcase your writing skills, or to create an online brand for yourself. Many people have started blogs while unemployed and used the blog to increase their exposure and get a new job. Be careful of what you write though. No trashing your old employer or using foul language. Once you put something on the internet it's there forever for all to see and judge so blog wisely.

Plan for your Pets - Let me just say that my pets are my babies and I am a huge supporter of animal rescue organizations. If you are concerned about losing your home or apartment and you don't feel you can keep your pets please contact local rescue organizations in advance so you can plan for their temporary care or adoption if you think it might be necessary. I have listed a couple or rescue websites below but all you need to do is to go to google.com and type in your pet type, location, and the term "rescue organization" and you will find local rescue groups who can help you. People who abandon pets when they hit hard times are, in my opinion, the lowest of the low. There is no excuse for abandoning pets who love and count on you. Plan for their future if you are worried about yours.

Article by Liz Handlin and courtesy of Ultimate Resumes

Posted by Candice Arnold on February 27, 2009 at 1:11 PM | Leave a Comment (0)

For most people, especially those job seekers with very little interviewing success, there is nothing more nerve-racking than preparing for a job interview. That unexpected call from a potential employer sends many job seekers into anxiety and increases their stress levels.

As the lead Certified Employment Interview Coach with, I always advise my clients to take an interview invitation as a compliment, as it shows that the employer considers them qualified for the job opening. An interview provides you with the chance to "close the deal" with an employer and to show that you are the right candidate for the job. There are common mistakes that job seekers make during and prior to an interview, however the following are things you can do to ensure that you align your key interview messages with the requirements of the role you are targeting.

1. Research the industry and organization you are targeting.


2. Evaluate the skills and experience that you bring to this role - focus on selling or aligning those skills to the needs of the employer and be ready to support them with examples.


3. Dress professionally to impress the employer - it is always best to be on the side of caution and give up the trendy clothing for conservative business wear.


4. Be on time - better yet, try to arrive early.


5. Make eye contact - this is paramount, think about all the negative feedback Senator John McCain received from the public for his inability to make eye contact with Senator Barack Obama during the recent US Presidential debate. Eye contact is critical.


6. Demonstrate enthusiasm for the job and the company - this shows your self-motivation and fit for the role.


7. Always ask questions - most job seekers treat the interview as an opportunity for the employer to learn about them, however it is also an opportunity for job seekers to learn about a potential employer. So engage the interviewer, and get as much facts as you can about the company and the role so you can make an informed decision if presented with a job offer.


8. Demonstrate courtesy by saying "thank you" - remember to send a thank you note following an interview.

Finally, if you have difficulty conveying your strengths in an interview, I suggest working with a Certified Interview Coach. As the Head of Interviewing Coaching at Resume Solutions, I work with job seekers at all levels from students to CEOs, helping them identify their strengths and weakness. In addition, if you need help, do not hesitate to call on a professional interview coach at Resume Solutions . Your career may depend on it!

Surranna Sandy, a Certified Professional Résumé Writer and Certified Employment Interview Coach and former Human Resources Management Professional, is the Founder and President of Résumé Solutions . The company offers advanced résumé writing, career and interview coaching services for entry level, mid-career through to executive clientele in the global marketplace, and her team of client focused résumé writers and career coaches have helped thousands of job seekers meet their career goals.

Posted by Surranna Sandy on February 26, 2009 at 9:35 PM | Leave a Comment (0)

For many, the start of a new year means the start of a new job search using the internet to research employers. For up coming college graduates in particular, it is opportunity to get a head start in getting their careers off the ground using online resources. At the same time, many employers are also researching potential job candidates through Google, Myspace.com and Facebook.com and what they are finding could be used as reasons not to hire you.

A recent poll conducted for Careerbuilder.com showed that 26 percent of hiring managers admitted to using the Internet to perform background checks on job candidates. A further 12 percent admitted to using social networking sites such as MySpace.com and Facebook.com as a screening tool.

For many college students, social networking sites such as Facebook.com and Myspace.com are a core part of their cyber profile used for networking. However, many students are surprised to learn that their candid and sometimes sexually explicit photos and the details of their drinking and dating lives in their profiles can negatively affect their job search. Those disparaging comments, risqué photos, inappropriate language and lewd jokes posted on their profiles could be viewed as a reflection of their character by a potential employer.

According to an HR director, people should carefully consider their potential audience and the impression they may have based on your pictures, personal opinions, and ideas posted online. "We were in the process of extending an offer to a great candidate, until his myspace.com page was brought to our attention. He had a great resume, went to an elite school and had impeccable references. However, our review of his myspace profile highlighted his recreational drug use. This made us immediately reconsider hiring him," says an HR Director for a financial services company in Toronto, Ontario. "Our company is very conscious of client relations and our public image and we could not risks this candidate's background being taken as a reflection of organization. "

A recent poll of Resume Solutions student clients showed that over 60% of the respondents were unaware that their profiles on social networking websites could be viewed by potential employers. This is surprising, despite the increased media attention focused on employers reviewing Myspace and Facebook prior to making hiring decisions.

Prior to starting a new job search, it is recommended that job seekers perform a Google search on their names to find out what a potential employer may read or see about them online. If any questionable content is discovered, content you would not feel comfortable if an employer or your parents view, then request that the site's webmaster remove it immediately.

Questionable content may include nude photos, slanderous comments or photographs that show you in inappropriate situations. Keep in mind you may encounter resistance in getting the content removed, however, you can let them know that they may be affecting your future job prospects and you may have no choice but to seek legal recourse. For that information, absolutely you cannot have removed due to lack of control, construct a plausible answer to counter or explain away to a hiring manager.
We are not advocating that social networking sites are to be used solely for job searching or building a web portfolio of your resume and job skills, but it makes sense to remove as much of the negative content about yourself as is possible. You should be smart and discreet in your online communications and consider creating private profiles for just your family members and friends.

There are many ways to create a "positive cyber profile" that does not affect your career prospects. College students can create personal web pages and profiles at social networking sites that include their resumes, hobbies and interests, details on leadership activities or academic successes. You can also include photos of yourself but ensure they do not include explicit materials. Job seekers can use their online profiles to demonstrate their excellent communication skills, establish a professional image of themselves prior to an in-person meeting, demonstrate their creativity and diverse interest - things that can set them apart from other job seekers.

As more and more users flock to social networking sites, the affect these sites have on the job search and candidate screening may include employers going even deeper into candidate's personal and professional lives. It is therefore advisable to put nothing online that have the potential to hurt your future job prospects and include anything that would help you in landing a new job. Use common sense when creating an online profile.

Remember that employers who do online searches are looking for reasons not to hire you.

Surranna Sandy, a Certified Professional Résumé Writer and Certified Employment Interview Coach and former Human Resources Management Professional, is the Founder and President of Résumé Solutions The company offers advanced résumé writing, career and interview coaching services for entry level, mid-career through to executive clientele in the global marketplace. Her team of client focused résumé writers and career coaches have helped thousands of job seekers meet their career goals.

Posted by Surranna Sandy on February 26, 2009 at 9:30 PM | Leave a Comment (1)

If you have a gap in your employment history, you may have concerns about how to explain this on your resume.

Keep in mind that many people step away from the workplace each year to raise children, care for ill/aging family members, return to school, recover from an illness/accident, or for some other reason. So the good news is that there is less of a stigma attached to this than there used to be.

It's possible that you may not even need to explain the gap. For example, if you were away from the workforce from February 2006 to October 2007, you can de-emphasize the 20-month gap by listing years of employment (vs. months and years).

But if the gap spans multiple years, and especially if the gap has occurred within the last five years, then it may need to be addressed on either the resume or the cover letter. Employers like to see the work chronology, and may wonder what you were doing if large gaps are present.

Serving as the primary caregiver for a family member or taking a sabbatical to pursue a degree are valid explanations for a gap. You can also fill this time period by showcasing any volunteerism, consulting, or self-study you completed. Treat this experience just as you would a paid, full-time position, and try to include examples of key contributions you made. For example, if you helped with a school fundraising drive, mention how your efforts were instrumental in meeting or exceeding the giving goal. Be sure to emphasize skills and accomplishments that are relevant to your current career objective.

Best wishes for job search success!

Article by, Karen Hofferber and courtesy of Kim Isaacs and ResumePower blog.

Posted by Candice Arnold on February 26, 2009 at 1:40 PM | Leave a Comment (0)

Most CV's are sent in reply to an advertisement. This gives you a context. Our sample cover letter will guide you through the process of writing such a cover letter. You need to take care to refer the right advertisement and position since a company may have several advertisements running.

Analyzing an advertisement

Sometimes, advertisements are not clear about the position or leave out key requirements of the job or hardly give any information about the company. This is understandable as they work on a tight budget and space is at a premium. We can call up the organization or get information from the net. We are giving below a sample advertisement and a sample cover letter in response.

Advertisement

Seema saw the following advertisement in her local paper:

Sales Executives required urgently

Kindly apply in writing enclosing CV to S.Williams, Area Manager, Sunny Agents.

Seema initially analyzes the ad to clearly determine the skills and personality traits required.

The following list was made:

• Mature
• Outgoing personality
• Deal with a wide range of people
• Cheerful attitude
• Initiative
• Flexible hours
• Previous sales experience

Seema has three years previous sales experience and she is confident of meeting all other criteria. She keeps her list nearby as she drafts her sample cover letter.

Dear Mr.Williams,

I read with great interest your ad for Sales executive which appeared in the Times of India dated 2nd December 2008. I am very keen as my background matches the qualifications you are seeking.

As you will note from my enclosed resume, I have more than three years experience in the field. At Carlsons, I had the opportunity to work as a Sales Assistant interacting with well known clients such as Hewlett Packard, Cadbury's and General Motors. I am considered outgoing with lots of enthusiasm. In my professional life, I have had to interact with a wide range of people from Vice President to Purchase executives. I have no hesitation in working flexible hours.

I have always been complimented on the quality of work and have twice received the 'Best employee of the year' award. Although I am happy in my present position, I look forward to a more challenging job that combines my creativity and leadership skills.

I look forward to personally meeting you for an interview at the earliest.

Sincerely yours,

Article by, Suresh Nair and courtesy of Resume Writing Quick Guide - Quick way to a professional resume

Posted by Candice Arnold on February 20, 2009 at 9:38 AM | Leave a Comment (0)

With over 500,000 people losing their jobs in the month of November 2008, and over 10 million unemployed in the United States to date, the thought of acquiring a job can almost seem hopeless. But it's not. Companies are still hiring, jobs are still available, and you can have one - as long as you don't give up.

But what do you do in the meantime to keep yourself occupied? If you're not busy while waiting to hear back from prospective employers, you can easily fall into a state of hopelessness - not good. So if you feel yourself getting down about your job search, here are a few strategies to keep you moving ...

Don't Stop Searching

This may sound obvious, but while you're waiting to hear back from a prospective employer, don't stop searching for work. This means treating your job search like a full-time job. It may be tempting to say to yourself, "I've already submitted my resume to 12 companies. I've done enough." But unless those 12 companies are currently calling you for an interview, you have more work to do.

Luckily, job searches are easier than ever with search tools all over the Internet that provide customizable job-seeking functions. So if you have the Internet at home, your job for now will be to prop yourself in front of the computer and search all day. The more seeking you do, the more opportunities will open up to you.

Market Yourself

Marketing is a strategy that many job seekers don't consider as a part of their job search strategy - but it works. You may be accustomed to posting your resume on websites like Monster and CareerBuilder, which are both great for marketing. But unless you know certain keywords to strategically place throughout your document, it may be difficult for prospective employers to find you.

This is why it's good to not only learn proper resume-posting procedures, but also try marketing yourself through websites like Craigslist, as well as signing up for accounts with sites like LinkedIn and Facebook. On Craigslist, you can post a free ad in your city's "services" section to market the same skills you post on your resume (look at other ads in this section for structuring ideas). And on LinkedIn and Facebook, you can create profiles to list your skills and link up with prospective employers. All of these options can work well to get your name and skills out there. They can not only help you score a temporary or part-time gig to keep money flowing until you get the full-time job offer, they might lead you to the full-time opportunity you're looking for.

Maintain the Right Attitude

If you become discouraged due to a lack of responses, or begin to feel down that you're unemployed, it can negatively affect your job search. Just remember, anything can change at a moment's notice, so stay positive and keep searching. And whatever you do, don't mentally absorb all of the bad news you hear about the job market. Remember, it does not have to apply to you.

Keeping yourself busy while looking for a job can definitely be a job within itself. But by searching daily, marketing yourself and keeping the right attitude, you will get that anticipated callback in no time.

Heather Eagar is a former professional resume writer and is passionate about providing working professionals with current, reliable and effective job search tools and information. Need a resume writing service? Compare the top ones in the industry at http://www.resumelines.com.

Posted by Heather Eagar on February 16, 2009 at 2:09 PM | Leave a Comment (0)

I have recently written resumes for several individuals who have spent long careers (20 - 40 years) with a single employer. None of these people had a functional resume before we started working together and most of them had not kept detailed notes about past jobs and accomplishments.

When I graduated from college in 1989 most large companies had college graduate training programs and if you joined one, the company expected that you would stay with them for many years, or perhaps, your entire career. Companies invested in a multitude of training programs and development opportunities designed to groom junior employees into senior level roles. Employee loyalty was valued and was rewarded by company loyalty - if you weren't particularly good at one job, the company would move you to a department in which your strengths could be utilized. Good employees were valued and were treated accordingly.

Jobs and workplaces certainly have changed since 1989. Generation Y employees view themselves as short-term employees wherever they go and they have a plan for navigating different employers/industries over the course of their career. There is no shame in moving from employer to employer anymore - in fact "job hopping" is a reality that stems from the fact that employers are no longer loyal to employees. Today every employee has to look out for his own best interests and always keep an eye out for great new opportunities no matter how nicely his employer is treating him today.

If you are employed by one of the few remaining companies that have employed "lifers" whether it's a government job, not-for-profit, or private sector you need to start keeping track of your accomplishments. When the time comes for you to retire or you are laid off you need to be able to create a resume which clearly explains the unique skills and accomplishments that you bring to a potential employer.

I spent many years at the Federal Reserve Bank of Chicago which is an employer that invests in its employees and expects long tenure. I can remember being given very high profile special projects by the COO, successfully completing them, getting a pat on the back and then, as a reward, being assigned another high profile project. It was great. Some of the projects were unrelated to my "real" job and others were only important internally and wouldn't necessarily seem significant to anyone outside the Fed. I have recently worked with several clients who had the same types of experiences - you are tagged as a high potential employee and given lots of cool assignments that are industry/company specific but that may be unimportant to a potential employer. How do you get that kind of information on paper? Or do you?

What I try to do is to figure out which projects might be relatable to another employer and relevant to the job my client plans to seek. Some projects or experiences just don't make sense to include on a resume even if they were very important to your career at one point in time. The other thing I try to do is to make sure to "translate" the terminology unique to your long-term employer into terms that are universally meaningful.

If you are one of the fortunate few who have spent your entire career with one or two large employers, do yourself a favor and start keeping notes on every job you have had. Maybe you will keep your job until you retire and can live off your pension. But, should something unexpected happen, you need to have organized information that can be used to craft a resume that will help you get a job in an increasingly competitive job market.

Article by Liz Handlin and courtesy of Ultimate Resumes

Posted by Candice Arnold on February 16, 2009 at 1:05 PM | Leave a Comment (0)

Just because you may be entering retirement age does not mean that you are too old to work if you still want (or need) to. In fact, many companies are looking to the Baby Boomer generation and beyond to fill in roles that require years of experience.

So if you're looking to come out of retirement, or simply want to switch jobs and are at an age that some might consider older, don't put yourself out of the game. Instead, take on a few of these strategies to help you market yourself so that you can obtain the same great opportunities as your younger counterparts.

Remember, You're Experienced

Everyone knows that as an older worker, you're coming to the table with years of experience that someone out of college could only dream of. But your level of experience goes way beyond just years of responsibility. You also have life experience.

You may have been through difficult periods in your life where your primary goal was to keep a roof over your family's heads and food on the table. So now that a recession is upon us, to you, this is old news - been there, done that. When marketing yourself to a prospective employer, it helps to note the level of work and life experience you hold. Employers can appreciate an emotionally stable mind in the midst of times that can leave fragile souls weaker than ever before.

You're Confident and Self-Sufficient

Unlike a younger counterpart who may just be starting out in the work world and is feeling a bit overwhelmed and under-confident, you have been in the midst of new challenges multiple times throughout your life. You know how to adapt quickly to a new environment, don't need constant feedback and reassurance that you're a good worker, and aren't too intimidated to reach out to people you don't know to ask for help or begin projects. You understand that when the job needs to get done, it needs to get done - and you don't let fears get in the way of doing just that. You've seen too much to have inhibitions at this stage in your life - definitely a great asset to market to any prospective employer.

Learning and Being a Team Player is No Problem

One concern of employers looking at older candidates is whether that candidate will be easy to train and work with, or stuck in his or her ways. It is important to assure any prospective employer that you are incredibly flexible, love to learn new things and enjoy working with others. You can use examples in your resume, cover letter, and interview of new technologies you've used and how you were successful in group environments in the past. You want to make sure the employer understands you will not be difficult as you may be stereotyped to be. Instead, you are the exact opposite and look forward to making a substantial difference in their company.

Applying for a new job in your later years can be as easy as it was when you were young if you market yourself well. So don't be intimidated. Instead, take control and show them what they'd be missing if they didn't hire you.

Heather Eagar is a former professional resume writer and is passionate about providing working professionals with current, reliable and effective job search tools and information. Need a resume service? Compare the top ones in the industry at http://www.resumelines.com.

Posted by Heather Eagar on February 11, 2009 at 2:27 PM | Leave a Comment (0)

When I was about 4 years old we moved from Houston, Texas to a little town called Cushing, Oklahoma which is where I spent the next 13 years of my life. When we arrived in Cushing my parents, of course, needed to find childcare and that is how Mae Troxell came into our lives.

Mae was born in 1902 on a cotton farm in Nacogdoches, Texas so when we moved to Oklahoma in 1972 she was 70 years old. Mae was a tough old broad who was, on a good day, cranky, and on a bad day downright cantankerous. She demanded from all of her clients that she be given authority to spank her charges because she felt that if she assumed responsibility for their safety she also needed to be able to control the kids. I never got a spanking from her but I am pretty sure that both of my brothers felt the sting of the wire handle of a fly swatter on their bare legs a couple of times.

At first Mae started coming to our house only when my parents went out but over time she started coming over every day - sort of like a nanny I guess but the truth is that she was getting old so we were keeping an eye on her as much as she was watching out for us. Despite her prickly demeanor, over time, we came to realize that she cared deeply about all of us. And as I got older she told me stories about her life and she gave me some advice that continues to influence my life to this day.

Mae's mother died when she was young and her father remarried a woman who had several kids - I don't recall the exact number but I think there were about 10 kids in the household. Her father had a cotton farm and the whole family worked the farm. According to Mae picking cotton is really hard and unpleasant work. Mae told me that one of her step brothers used to pick unripe pieces of cotton that were still encased in their shells and throw them at her and her sister; apparently getting hit by them hurt a lot. So one day Mae and her sisters ambushed him, held him down, rolled up his pants legs, and beat him around the legs with nettle plants. He never bothered them again. I told you she was tough.

Mae grew up poor, never went to college, and then got married to a man named Lee Troxell who left her with 2 kids whom she raised in poverty but who turned out alright. Mae was never afraid to work. She always took in washing and ironing to earn extra cash. When she was eligible for social security, she found it didn't pay enough for her to live on which was why she became our babysitter.

Mae had a tough life and from that life she learned a few things. One of them is not to let anyone bully you (see the above story about her step brother) but that isn't the advice that affected me so much. Here are the two pieces of wisdom that Mae shared that have affected every decision in my life:

"Hold your head high 'cause ain't no one else going to do it for you".
This is advice we can all use. Be proud of yourself and be confident in your abilities because if you aren't no one else will be. This single sentence has gotten me through some of the toughest times in my life.

"Get the best education money can buy because no one can ever take it away from you."
I preach this to every one of my cousins and any students I work with. A good education is more valuable than gold because it can never be taken away and you will benefit from it every day.

Mae died in August 1985, a month before I left for the University of Chicago. I was sad that she never got to see me go to college but she knew I got accepted to a top-tier university and she was proud. I wish she were still here to see that her lessons are still alive and well and have influenced my life in such a positive way. And hopefully, now that you have read this post, her lessons will influence you too.

Article by Liz Handlin and courtesy of Ultimate Resumes

Posted by Candice Arnold on February 9, 2009 at 11:40 AM | Leave a Comment (0)