Question:
I just started my first job out of college and I really enjoy it, except that my direct supervisor has made several inappropriate sexual comments to me. I asked him to stop, but he just did it again. Several of my co-workers have told me that I should just ignore him and get used to it because I'm attractive, female and work in a predominantly male industry. What should I do?
First Answer:
Report your supervisor to a Human Resources Manager IMMEDIATELY! Period the end.
-- Troy Behrens, JobGod.net
Second Answer:
There's an old adage, "What you do not correct, you condone." Because your supervisor is not suffering the consequences of his inappropriate behavior, and has been unresponsive to your request to stop making sexual comments, he is unlikely to change on his own.
The first step is to assess your supervisor's comments and your response to them. There are perfectly well-meaning men who may offer a compliment on your attire or hair that is completely innocent but may still make you uncomfortable or strike you as unprofessional. You don't want to over-react to what may be a simple and genuine compliment to which the correct response is "Thank you!. " "That suit looks great on you!" or "That blue blouse really brings out the color of your eyes" is a very different comment from "That blouse really shows off your breasts" or "It's dangerous to wear a skirt that short around me!" or "I bet your boyfriend likes that dress!" Even the first two comments, innocent in content, can be delivered with enough sexual innuendo to cause you discomfort; the last three are of course completely out of line.
Being attractive and female in a predominantly male industry means you will do well to learn how to accept compliments and keep your senses of humor and perspective, but it does not mean you have to put up with offensive and illegal behavior. As a young woman in her first job with a large corporation, I experienced some behavior I thought was boorish and inappropriate. I decided that I would take offense only if I felt the man was intentionally offensive, and that stance helped me to forge collegial professional relationships with the men I worked with and saved a lot of energy my female colleagues wasted fighting imaginary chauvinistic behavior. If you are truly offended, tell your supervisor his comments are unwelcome and offensive. If he continues to make such comments and you feel he is creating a hostile work environment, you may want to report them.
You also want to assess whether the comments are simply repetitive or whether the comments are escalating in sexual content or crudity. If they are escalating, they may progress to inappropriate suggestions of sexual contact, or to unwanted physical contact, or a threat or inducement to engage in sexual behavior in order to progress in the firm. You must report these incidents as soon as possible.
If your company has formal policies and reporting procedures for sexual harassment complaints, follow them. If not, go to Human Resources and ask to speak to the head of the department on a confidential matter (unless he is your supervisor, in which case you have to go to his boss). Management may intervene in such a way that your supervisor changes his behavior, or they may discipline him and reassign you to a different supervisor. If they do reassign you, make sure it is to a position as interesting and enjoyable as the one you have.
If the culture of the organization is macho and sexual comments and innuendo are tolerated throughout the organization, it may not be responsive to your complaint. In that case, you may have to find a new job outside this company, and discuss with an employment attorney if you have a legal case against your current employer as a result of the hostile environment created by your supervisor.
-- Carol Anderson, Career Development and Placement Office, Robert J. Milano Graduate School of Management and Urban Policy at New School University in New York City.
