Networking Isn't 50/50
If you're a savvy business professional, networking is probably as commonplace to you as checking email. You do it so often and so easily you don't even realize it anymore. And if you're like me (wishing there were 30 hours in a day instead of 24), you often have to prioritze work over networking. Or so you think.
One of my networking contacts, we'll call her Shannon, I've known since 2006. She has her own business and has had quite a quick rise in success that I think is a great combination of tenacity, innovation and just plain hard work. We finally met in person in early 2007 after email and phone conversations about how we can help each other and sketched out a few tentative plans. Some of those plans took off, and some didn't, but no harm no foul. We were both busy, both with good intentions and both interested in a longer-term professional relationship.
In early 2008, I reviewed some of the plans Shannon and I talked about and revisited some conversations by email. And Shannon was and continued to be (across the first few months of 2008) incredibly apologetic. She had promised to assist me on something she had promised and just hadn't had the time to do so until recenlty.
While I appreciated her sentiments, it got me thinking. Why apologize? Why do we have this need to make networking quid pro quo? In any relationship, things are almost never 50/50. Think about a dual career couple. One gets a great job offer, the other sacrifices to move for that job. But a few years later, the tides turn and it's the other spouse's time to be the career priority.
We spend so much time dissecting and evaluating the power of social networking and social networking tools--tools that make it easier to manage the 50/50 relationship. You're messaged in Facebook and it reminds you to message back. But the reality is networking relationships aren't--and shouldn't--be 50/50 all the time.
My mom often gives presents to people who have never given a gift to her. Ever. But she always has said she does it because she wants to. To me, that's the sentiment behind the best networkers.
Sure, I connected with Shannon because I thought there were ways we could help each other. But I am never looking for quid pro quo when it comes to networking. Nor should anyone else. I may not talk to Shannon every week, or every month. But chances are, if we're honest, upfront and true to our word for the long term, it will be a business relationship we both can use.
I'm not saying you should have 1000 Linked In contacts, or spend all day on altruism. Stick to contacts that could truly be mutually beneficial. Then, follow your natural instincts. Pursue the relationship as much as you're comfortable. Read the other person and use your gut. If they really are busy, and you're still willing to help or hold up your side of the bargain, chances are the long-term payoff (or the pay-it-forward) will be worth it...for both of you. It is all give and take. It may not add up to 100% now, but if you think it will over the long haul, it's an investment worth making.
Article by Career Coach and HR Executive, Susan D. Strayer, and courtesy of KaleidoBlog, career advice for a new generation.
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